Well that was interesting!

Last week I sent out a What Really Makes Money email about the motivational speaker who performed at our recent virtual summit.

As I wrote in the email, he was like Marmite.

People either loved his approach to self-confidence…

Or they HATED it.

Did you read that email?

If not, it was about how Robin Banks used this positive self-affirmation every day: “I am a top motivational speaker, successful throughout the world.”

The idea is that repeating a mantra like this over time will condition your brain to believe it – so that you begin to act like it’s true, and eventually BECOME it.

Well, I got a lot of feedback after that email.

And yet again, Robin has truly SPLIT THE CROWD!

Half the responses were positive…

But an equal number were negative… almost to the point of fury!

Like one reader who said,

“All this self-affirming psychobabble smells of utter b*llocks to me!!! No amount of talking sh#te in front of a mirror will change your reality.”

I understand this view, of course!

As I said in my original email, the self-affirmation technique is not very British.

It’s too over-the-top…

Too in-your-face…

And for many people (certainly my readers, anyway!) this kind of faked positivity is too cringeworthy to bear.

So today I have some different approaches you can try that shouldn’t make you feel uncomfortable.

However, before I show them to you, let me emphasise something…

Why Mindset Techniques DO Work

I have absolutely no doubt that there ARE genuine ways to ‘change your reality’.

And it’s not just happy-clappy woo-woo, either.

There’s plenty of science to back it up.

For example, a big idea in neuroscience is the theory of ‘predictive processing’.

Scientists believe our brains aren’t passive recording devices, where the real world pours in through our senses, and we just react to what’s ‘out there’.

Instead our brains are prediction machines.

Every second, your brain makes educated guesses about what’s going to happen next, including what you see, hear, feel and think.

It then adjusts those guesses when reality doesn’t quite match up.

So you don’t sit inside your head, passively, watching reality like a film.

You’re constantly constructing your experience of the world… writing the script… predicting scenes… filling in the blanks…

In this scientific sense, you do make your own reality.

Not in the magical ‘manifest your destiny’ way you might see on an anodyne motivational poster, but in a biological, cognitive way.

Every story you tell yourself is a forecast that your brain is trying to make true. So when you tweak those forecasts (ie. you expect something better to come), your brain subtly shifts the projections it makes.

What’s more, there is proof that you can re-wire your brain….

The science of neuroplasticity shows that new neural pathways form – and strengthen – after repeated behaviours (while others can weaken and wither away).

For example, research has shown that experienced London taxi drivers have unusually large posterior hippocampi (the area linked to spatial memory) because of their many years navigating the city.

This is the foundation for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, where you repeatedly challenge distorted thoughts (“I’m a failure in business”) and replace them with more balanced appraisals (“I made one mistake, but I will improve”).

So the upshot is, if you accept that it IS possible to change the way you see the world…

And, by default, the way you ACT in the world…

Then trying out mindset-altering techniques could be really valuable.

In fact, it could make ALL the difference.

The key is to find something that works for you.

That could mean shouting “I’M NUMBER ONE, I’M A TIGER” every day into the mirror.

But if you hate that sort of stuff, there are plenty of ‘quiet’ British-friendly techniques that won’t make you feel uncomfortable or ridiculous.

12 Cringe-Free Ways to Improve Your Mindset

1. The 90-Second Rule

If something will take less than 90 seconds, do it immediately.

It means that you don’t give your brain the chance to turn a small task into a big drama. Instead, by encouraging yourself to take small actions more often, you build momentum towards a bigger goal.

2. The ‘Future-You’ Favour

Every day, do one small thing that your future self will thank you for.

In the short term that could mean laying out your clothes for the next morning… or answering all your emails before breakfast to free-up your day.

But it could also mean sitting down for an hour to make a plan for a new business, or downloading a new tool that will allow you to create a product… something the ‘you’ in a year’s time will thank you for!

3. Micro-Upgrades

Instead of attempting a massive life overhaul in one go, which can be utterly overwhelming, make one microscopic change to your life every day.

For example, rather than give up smoking right away, try reducing the amount you smoke by one cigarette per day.

Or you can ask yourself, “What would make tomorrow 3% easier?” Then do that tiny thing which makes a small difference.

It won’t seem much, but over time the compounding effect can be life-changing!

4. Evidence Notebook

Write down three small things you did well today – as if you’re a police officer taking down notes as evidence.

This rewires your self-image through something called ‘the self-perception theory’ – the idea that your brain decides who you are by watching what you do and then adjusts accordingly.

By building up evidence in a notebook you can help your brain SEE your strengths and re-enforce them.

5. Start Badly

The hardest part of any important project is actually starting it.

There’s a natural resistance in the brain to doing anything outside your comfort zone. Which is why we often procrastinate, make excuses and get distracted.

However, as soon as you get going, your reward system kicks in, creating an inner motivational drive.

So rather than dither, begin badly on purpose!

Type nonsense, scribble a terrible design, fumble clumsily through a task.

It doesn’t matter how poor it is, just start, and you’ll find that your brain will begin to tune into the task.

6. Subtraction Habit

Instead of constantly adding new goals and new tasks, remove ONE pointless drain on your time and energy every week.

That might mean removing your usual lunch-hour doomscrolling on your phone… ditching the income plan that isn’t working… opting out of the Whatsapp Group… or unsubscribing from the newsletter that’s no longer relevant but keeps grabbing your attention.

Sometimes it’s doing less that can lead to achieving more.

7. Emotion Re-Labelling

‘Affect labelling’ is a technique where you identify and name your emotions. By labelling your feelings, you can have better control over them.

In fact, MRI studies show that naming emotions reduces activity in the amygdala, the part of your brain linked to the fear response.

And when a negative feeling is getting in the way of your success and happiness, you can RE-LABEL it. For example…

• “I’m not grumpy, I’m overworked.”
• “I’m not sad, I’m disappointed.”
• “I’m not anxious, I’m alert.”
• “I’m not unmotivated, I’m just uncertain where to start.”

You can then start to re-condition your brain to change the narrative, which will change your behaviour.

10. The Small Wins Tally

Every Sunday, jot down five victories from the previous week, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant.

It could mean you didn’t get angry at the news… or you sent that awkward email you’ve been putting off… or you managed to go on a long walk… or you read an inspiring What Really Makes Money email 😉

These little achievements send a message to your predictive brain that suggests “Good things happen when I act”.

11. The Quiet Pep-Talk

Instead of yelling into a mirror, “I can do this!”…

You could try a more British version, like “I will give this a go and see what happens.”

Just talk to yourself like you would a close friend, and give yourself gentle reassurance that it’s better to act than not to act.

12. Habit Piggy-Backing

If you want to develop a productive new habit, then hitch it onto something you already do.

For example, after you brush your teeth in the morning, add a 60 second stretch into the routine.

Before you make your morning coffee, do a 5 minute meditation.

Whenever you switch on your computer, begin with 10 minutes of research related to whatever project you’re working on.

Do Any of these Suit You?

If you think a few of these might be more your kind of thing than shouting “I’M A TIGER” then I highly recommend trying them out!

Or if you have something that you already do, which works well for you, let me know!